My 10-year-old niece came to my office to see me last week. She said she needed some help for her history class assignment. She said
Uncle Tom, why did Mr. Bush decide to attack Iraq? Is that because Iraq had atomic bombs?
It took me a few minutes to sort things out. But, honestly, I don’t know exactly why. I tried my best by saying
Honey, Mr. Bush saw many things that other people didn’t see. He thought Iraq had purchased uranium ore from an African country, which didn’t happen. He thought Saddam Hussein was behind 9-11, which didn’t happen, either. The truth is that Mr. Bush was delirious. That’s what happens to people when they drink too much alcohol in their 20s and 30s.
Then she goes
But Uncle Tom… How will history remember Mr. Bush? Will the history book say America went to war with Iraq because the president of the time was confused?
Smart kid… We will know what the history book will say about Mr. Bush in several months. Till then, let’s see how Adobe After Effects will remember him. Continue reading
Last month, I went to Peru as a volunteer to show Peruvian kids magic. I arrived at a very small village and went straight to the only elementary school there. I was well prepared. I knew several good coin tricks. I even took two pigeons with me if kids wanted to see real tricks. I entered a large classroom where I was silently welcomed by about 50 kids. I started my magic show with a couple of coin tricks at first. But the kids responded only with grim faces. So I said
All right, kids. Guess what’s going to appear when I open this cloth.
I expected that kids would be amazed to see my pigeon trick. But a little boy sitting at back stood up and said
Huh!? What is this kid? I didn’t bring my iMac all the way to Peru with me. What was he thinking? I didn’t forget to bring my MacBook with me, though. So I responded
Class, do you know what MacBook is? Continue reading
Many years ago, my wife and I were both young and adventurous. Almost every weekend, we traveled around the world. We wanted to see our limits. We wanted to explore nature. We wanted to conquer the world in our way.
One August weekend, we went to the Canadian Rocky. We got lost so badly, and the sunset was nearing. I knew a couple of male wolves were after us, actually just after my wife. So we had to hurry and reach the nearest village. But my wife was so tired that she could not walk even a yard. She told me to go without her. Leave her there, and let the wolves eat her? No! No, no, no! But I deserted her because the wolves were only interested in my wife.
I walked a quarter mile. When I looked behind, a strange, non-flying object came out of nowhere. I shouted “No!” and ran towards her. But my wife slowly approached it. That’s when she was abducted. I deserted her. And this is the price that I had to pay? Actually, she paid the price, not me. Anyway, I was wrong. I wanted her back. “Where is she!?” “Where are you!?” I called out her name 6 times. Ohh… 5 minutes after abduction, she came back. I asked her what happened. She said she made friends with a group of space aliens after giving them a bag of potato chips. Then she convinced them to teleport us to the near village. This is how her relationships with space aliens initially started. Continue reading
My wife has several friends from out of space. Last Friday, one of them brought a new group of aliens from a planet called %@!âˆ†3â‰¤Ã˜ÃŸ. (Sorry. I can’t spell it correctly in English.) Anyway, they were quite impressed with how beautiful our planet is. One of them said “How much?” Apparently, he was the chief delegate. He asked my wife some questions like the exact diameter of the earth, atmospheric components, distance from the sun. And he turned to one of his comrades and nodded. Then this guy started piling some sort of stones. My wife immediately responded by saying “Excuse us, but this planet is not for sale.” And this finance officer piled more stones and said “What, you want more?” My wife looked hopeless and out of hand. I had to do something quickly, or we would lose this planet. So I excused myself and went to the bathroom with my MacBook. Then I launched Adobe After Effects CS3. In a matter of 9 minutes or so, I created a QuickTime movie in which the earth rotates in front of the sun. Subsequently, I got out of the bathroom and showed this QuickTime movie to the aliens. And I said “You really want this? If you do, just take it.” Surprisingly, the aliens looked content with the QuickTime movie and gave us all the stones they had. Next day, they went back to their planet. Afterwards, my wife and I had a serious discussion. Should we pay for sales taxes? Continue reading
This is a very boring and simple After Effects sample we created. Although we are finished with After Effects and are unlikely to make any more video tutorials for it, unless requested, that’s what we do when we are bored. It required just a couple of effects such as Box Blur and Lens flare besides Illustrator files. Be advised not to watch it unless you are extremely bored. Continue reading